I am so sick of this subject, as I am sure most of heterosexual America is as well. The truth is that a lot of people on both sides of this issue simply do not understand why the other side feels the way they do about it.

For those of you on my side of the fence, this isn’t a religious issue for most of the people that oppose gay marriage. Stop swallowing the BS coming out of the DNC about how bible-beaters want to invade your bedrooms and haul you off to jail. Most Americans, as I do, believe that marriage has been defined as a union between a man and a woman since the beginning of time. It isn’t something that is up for debate. You don’t wake up one morning and decide that the world is indeed flat several hundred years after it was proven to be round. This isn’t about God – it is about fundamentally changing the definition of an institution that is engrained in every single culture on the face of this planet. Moreover, this isn’t the American people deciding this issue; it is rogue judges with liberal agendas legislating from the bench. I don’t care whether you are gay or straight – if you don’t have a problem with that concept then you are un-American – period. We have three branches of government with their own responsibilities. When you start letting one do something it isn’t supposed to be doing, chaos will ensue – period. These are not morally negotiable things if you believe in the rule of law and you believe in this country and how our system is supposed to work.

That being said, for those on the other side of the fence – get a grip. 99.9% of gay people do not want to run naked down main street USA. The other .1% that do are our version of “white trash” and they probably don’t have any business being naked in public anyway. It is quite likely that we would shriek in horror just like most of you would. We don’t want to recruit your children either. This isn’t the dark-side of the force here. Stop swallowing that “gay agenda” BS.

So, what do we want? Well, imagine this. You come home to find your wife/husband hanging by the neck from a doorway. Grief stricken, you call the police and when they arrive, they remove you from the premises because your name is not on the lease, it is in your wife’s/husband’s. The police won’t tell you whether it was foul play or suicide – in fact, they won’t tell you anything. As far as they are concerned, you are the one the found the body and that’s it. Then, days later after the funeral, they still refuse to let you back in to the home you shared with your wife/husband for the last 10 years. This isn’t some nutty scenario that would never happen, it did happen to someone we know, recently – and, in of all places, San Francisco. What we want is not to be told our relationships don’t matter.

I am lucky enough to work for a company that offers Domestic Partnership insurance. I have worked for this company for 12 years and never had a need to use it until recently. So brassguy can use my insurance when he goes to the hospital, but I can’t visit him because I am not “family” – go figure.

I blame this confusion on gay activists, rogue judges – and Gavin Newsom. Instead of sitting down and trying to win support for civil unions to address issues straight couples take for granted and to try to foster an understanding of the issues gay couples face, they run to activist judges that are all too willing to legislate from the bench; they openly DEFY California state law to further their own political careers. And in doing so, they alienate the people whose understanding and cooperation we need.

It is no wonder that there is a lot of animosity on both side of the issue, but let’s get one thing straight (no pun intended): The vast majority of people that believe that “marriage” should be between a man and woman do not hate gay people. Likewise, most gay people would settle for legal arrangements, regardless of they are called, that protect us from discrimination.

Both sides have an honest gripe here. How freaking hard can it be to satisfy the majority on both sides of this if we would just try to understand the other point-of-view?